|
Goals of
misbehavior
|
What child
is thinking
|
How adult
feels and reacts
|
Child's
response to adult's
action
|
Some corrective
guidelines
|
| Attention |
I
count only when I am being noticed or served. |
Annoyed;
wants to remind, coax. |
Temporarily
stops disturbing action when given attention but soon
continues;
-may
begin new behavior to gain attention. |
Ignore
when possible; give attention in unexpected ways;
-give
attention for positive behavior; never give attention on demand. |
| Power |
I
count only when I am dominating, when you do what I want you to do,
when I can do whatever I want. |
Provoked,angry;
generally wants power; -challenged; "l'll make him/her do
it";
"You can't get away with it." |
Intensifies
action when reprimanded;
-child
wants to win, be boss: defiance. |
Withdraw
from conflict; act, rather than talk;
-be
friendly.Establish equality;
-redirect
child's efforts into constructive channels. |
| Revenge |
I
can't be liked;I don't have power but l'll count if I can hurt others
as I feel hurt by life. |
Hurt;
"How can he/she do this to me?"; -retaliates, tries to
get
even. |
Wants
to get even; -makes self disliked. -Seeks further
revenge. |
Maintain
order with minimum restraint; -avoid retaliation or
punishment.
-Take
time and effort to help child.
-Build
trusting relationship. |
| Display
of
inadequacy |
I
can't do anything right so I won't try to
do anything
at all; I am no good |
Despair,
hopeless, discouraged; "I give up." |
No
reprimand therefore no reaction;
-feels
there is no use to try;
-passive;
no improvement |
Encourage
any positive effort;
-faith
in a child's ability;
-don't
give up, pity or criticize.
-Be
patient. |
