Sunday

Viagra

An elderly gentleman went to see his doctor and asked for a prescription of Viagra.

The doctor said, "That's no problem. How many do you want?"

The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces."

The doctor said, "That won't do you any good."

The elderly gentleman said, "That's all right. I don't need them for sex anymore as I am over 90 years old.
I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes."

Sent by Madeleine

Saturday

Negotiations

Negotiations between the teachers and the Board were at an impasse.

Hours of discussion had centred around abuse of sick days.

Negotiations were set to continue the following morning.

As both sides looked at each other across the table, the Board's chief negotiator held up the morning paper and loudly stated "..and this teacher called in sick yesterday."

There on the front page of the sports section was a picture of a teacher who had won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.

The union negotiator looked at the picture an then calmly stated: "Just think of what his score could have been if he wasn't sick!"

Negotiations for the day ended.

Sent by Bah Bah